with apologies to Dorothy Parker)

Imperial beers, my dear are dangerous
Have three at the very most.
Have four and you're under the table.
Have five and you're under the host.


Thomas Louvering

But if at the Church they would give us some ale,
And a pleasant fire our souls to regale,
We'd sing and we'd pray all the live-long day,
And never once wish from the Church to stray.


Sidney Sudster

Starkle starkle little twink
who the heck you are I think
I'm not under what you call
the alcofluence of incohol
I'm just a little slort of sheep
I'm not drunk like tinkle peep
I don't know who is me yet
but the drunker I stand here the longer I get
Just give me one more drink to fill me cup
'cuz I got all day sober to Sunday up.


Jay Bee

      Little boy blue come drink your
beer,                       Asleep in the meadow, after too
much cheer.                 Where is the little boy that looks
after the beer?     Passed out under a haystack, hung
over it would appear.


Special thanks all for sending in the poems!

Be a Beer Muse.  Send your poems/stories
to webmaster@beernexus.com
The Beer Muse
Beer Muse Archive